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If you’re a fiercely independent solo adult with ADHD, you’ve probably bought into the Lone Wolf Myth: the belief that you can (and should) handle life entirely on your own.

I get it—I’ve been there. I’m Christine Dunning, life coach, cat owner, and lifelong member of the “I Can Do It Myself” club. Independence has been my badge of honor for decades. But here’s the reality: no matter how strong your ADHD independence streak is, you cannot drive yourself home from a colonoscopy.

Yep, sometimes even the lone wolf needs a carpool.

ADHD and the Myth of Independence

Independence is empowering, especially for those of us living solo with ADHD. But ADHD brains can make asking for help way harder than it should be. Between executive dysfunction, guilt, and the fear of being a burden, we end up doing mental gymnastics instead of sending a simple text.

This often means:

• Skipping medical appointments we shouldn’t (hi, overdue colonoscopy).

• Overextending ourselves because we don’t want to “owe” anyone.

• Confusing self-sufficiency with self-isolation.

The truth? ADHD adults thrive on structure, support, and accountability. If you’re solo, that means intentionally building a support system—not to give up your independence, but to protect it.

Building Support Systems Without Burning Out

If you’re an introvert, ambivert, or someone who finds socializing draining, the idea of “community” can feel exhausting. But support doesn’t have to mean big brunches or group texts. Try these ADHD-friendly strategies:

• One-on-one connections: Focus on friends who energize you instead of draining you.

• Mutual support swaps: “You take me to my colonoscopy; I’ll bring you soup when you’re sick.”

• Social energy budgeting: Save your limited energy for the people and situations that matter most.

• Ask directly: Don’t vaguebook or hint—be clear. (“Hey, can you drive me to X? I’ll return the favor.”)

Remember: asking for help isn’t weakness. It’s a skill. And yes, you can learn it—even with ADHD.

A Health PSA (Because I Care)

If you’re 45 or older, please schedule your colonoscopy. I was diagnosed with ulcerative colitis at age nine and later faced colorectal cancer. Early detection matters. And I promise, the prep is worse than the procedure.

Final Thoughts on ADHD and Independence

The Lone Wolf Myth is just that—a myth. ADHD self-sufficiency is admirable, but real resilience comes from knowing when to reach out.

If you’re ready to build systems that work for your ADHD brain (without sacrificing your independence), let’s talk. I offer a free 30-minute coaching session for solo adults with ADHD who want strategies for real life. Book yours here.

And remember: even Batman needed Alfred.